The world feels a little uncertain these days with turmoil in politics, the environment, and health care. The desire to be our "best selves" particularly in January is constant however. To improve some part of our lives feels particularly important when the world around seems less in our control.
Personally, I’ll make the usual resolutions and eat less junk food, move more and be more patient.
What will you resolve? Maybe you don’t make resolutions, but if you do and they include something like "do everything I can to get pregnant in 2025" here is my advice:
1. Get a referral to see a fertility specialist right away. Not pregnant in 4-6 months? Talk to a family doctor and get referred as it takes a few months to get an appointment. This wait is hard, we know, but during that time we’ll have you do some testing so we can "hit the ground running" when we do see you. Remember the wait is for a reason - we are helping lots of people like you.
2. Don’t over test yourself - it causes stress. My most stressed patients seem to be the ones monitoring their basal body temperature and charting their cervical mucous. I know it is important to ovulate and to have intercourse at the right time, but excessive testing is counterproductive.
Check your urine for LH using ovulation predictor kits you can buy at a pharmacy or on-line. I suggest you buy them online as they are cheaper. A more expensive option is Mira. No matter what you are using, you’ll start testing around cycle day 9-10 and by the 16-17th day of your cycle, the ovulation kit should have turned positive.
3. Trust your fertility doctor. I know we aren’t perfect but all we do is help people like you get pregnant. We know it takes patience and time to find success but most of our patients do eventually find success. We got this - let us carry the heavy load of infertility with you. So, if you have a question or need reassurance - call your nurse, email, or call your doctor.
4. Love your partner (if you have one, if you don’t then doubly love yourself!). This process can tear couples apart, cause depression and anxiety and bring out the worst in people. Remember you are both worried and you are both trying your best to get to a healthy pregnancy.
5. Do the tests we suggest. I know they are painful (the HSG), embarrassing (the semen analysis), a hassle to organize (the blood testing) and you are busy but the few tests we suggest really do give us a lot of information about your fertility.
6. Before you see your doctor think about a couple of things: why do you think you aren’t getting pregnant? How often do you have a period? Review your past health history in your mind, like the appendix you had removed, the chlamydia your ex- gave you, the weight you gained/lost in the past year, etc. Are there any diseases in the family (including infertility)? Having that information can help us sort out why you aren’t pregnant.
7. If you are over 42, consider the ways you are open to trying: IVF? Donated eggs? Surrogacy? Adoption? After age 42, it is more common for couples to have to try something more aggressive or different than traditional pregnancy to have a child.
8. Be patient. This is the tough part. Persistence pays off. I cannot tell you how many emails this holiday read things like "here’s a picture of our new baby, thanks for not giving up on us", or "we’re pregnant on our 6th insemination", or "just when we had given up, my period is late!" or "here’s a Christmas photo of the baby - our last embryo was the good one!". Emails like that are sent to me almost daily. Sure, many people get lucky the first IUI or embryo transfer, but most people take a few attempts. Hang in there!
May good things happen for you and your family in 2025. Let’s make it a fertile year.
Dr. Beth Taylor
